Those who think weird fetishes are rare don’t know sex. People get off on all sorts of things, and if everyone consents to it, nobody gets hurt, and they’re not illegal, who are we to say they’re weird in the first place? On the other hand, introducing fetishes to a partner may be tricky business, so we’d like to help you do it as painlessly and effortlessly as possible.
Tip 1: Trust Is Key
If you’ve been with a partner for a while, but have been avoiding the weird fetish conversation, we’d like to help you draw up the courage and finally open up. The key component to your success is the trust that you and your partner share. Your relationship has seen its fair share of ups and downs, and the fact that you’re still together means you provide support to each other, and trust that the other person will not betray you. Use this to your advantage when bringing up the topic of weird fetishes by praising the time you’ve shared together, and saying you’d just like to take your sex life to a new level. Tell your partner you will not pressure them into anything, but trust that they will understand your desires, and work with you to satisfy them step by step.
Tip 2: Ease Into It
Your partner might be shocked or they might tell you they’ve suspected all along that you wanted more in the bedroom, and are there for you to explore any types of fetishes that you’d like. If you get the former reaction, you’ll need to take a step back and give your partner time to adjust to the new situation. Going from conventional to kinky sex usually doesn’t happen overnight, and just because your partner is hesitant at first doesn’t mean they won’t come around soon enough. Don’t pressure your partner, but do suggest proactive ways to explore your fetishes. For instance, if you want your partner to pee on you, first suggest watching a sex video where people do it. You could also start with warm tea before upgrading to actual pee.
Tip 3: Give Them Time
Don’t automatically assume if your partner doesn’t want to do it right away that they never will or that they don’t love you. Explain to them that you won’t leave them or love them any less if they don’t indulge you in this way, but make it clear that you’d like to change the course of your sex life to make it more exciting and pleasurable. Don’t rush into anything because you might scare off your partner or make them feel inadequate to satisfy your needs. Tell them you’re happy with your sex life the way it is so you don’t shatter their self-confidence, and explain that your definition of fetish is flexible. See how they respond and take it from there. They might need less time than you think, and might pleasantly surprise you with initiative.